Well today has been interesting...cell phone went through the wash, hubs lost expensive pair of Oakley's and the POTTY HAS NOT BEEN USED BY ETHAN at all today!!! I think he is digressing as he has had so many accidents in the past 3 days.
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I have gotten SO frustrated and SO discouraged and then I feel SOOO guilty.
I have cried, prayed and read my bible more today than I have in the past few weeks. How can someone I love with such a deep love that I cant even put into words, someone I love so much I would do anything for, give my life for...how can some things he does be so frustrating??
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A customer came over tonight to pick up an order and I lost it...totally lost it. This wasn't the first time we have met so I was thankful for that! We had a good chat (thanks BJ). I loved how we could just talk about life and frustrations and joys of being a mom. I am sure she had no idea she would be playing "encourager" as she walked into our house tonight.
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I think this is one of my very very favorite things about owning my own business from home. Talking and relating to all the women who are going through (or have been through) exactly what I am going through. I love the encouragement we can offer each other and the laughs we share about the funny things our kids do and say. They joys really do outweigh the frustrations. I love knowing that I am not the only one who blows it every now and then.
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Aren't you so thankful for the grace of God??? Seriously, I thought about how impatient I was with Ethan today after about the 3rd accident he had and just wept...I just thought about how it would be if the Lord were that impatient with me when I have "accidents". He pours so much grace over me and is so patient with my childlike ways. I want more than anything to show the love of Christ to my boys through how I treat them, their daddy and others. And today, I failed...miserably...and I am sure this is not the last of these days although I pray they are far and few.
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If you are still reading, well then you have really gotten to know a part of me that the majority of you probably didn't know as I usually only blog about bags and add a few pics of my family : )
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Don't be scared to come over to our house to pick up your order in the future...I don't typically lay my whole day out for customers, I'll try to have it more together for you :) But you will definitely be entering our "real family life" as there are no fronts put on by us. I hope to at least be out of my pj's and have a path cleared from toys so you can enter safely :)
14 comments:
Oh Jess, I wish I could just give you a big hug!! I have had too many days like that! The 10 months we spent with Josh multiple accidents daily, made me about lose my mind! There were many days I just bawled because I felt like the worst Mom and knew I should show more grace to him.
You are NOT alone and I still so often feel like a failure as a mother. thank you for sharing your heart. I love you and will pray for little Ethan that he can remember how to do the potty thing!
I echo Rebekah's comments, you are not alone my friend!
I hate days like that and I wish I never had them - but like you said, it brings us back to our Father and makes us realize how GOOD He is!
Love you!
I hear you girl. Days like that are, unfortunately, part of motherhood. In those pre-kid days, I never realized how being a Mom would make me feel so inadequate, aware of my own sinfulness, and so in need of a Savior. Thankfully HE showers grace upon us. His mercies are NEW every morning - Great is His Faithfulness!
Love you friend!
I feel for you Jessica! I just started potty training Noah yesterday and it can be so frustrating!
God tells is that if we just ask for wisdom that HE will pour it out on us. So that is what I've been doing. I just pray that God will give me wisdom to raise our boys and to give me grace to extend to them when they have accidents. I've also been talking to Noah about grace and forgiveness and how God extends His grace and forgiveness to me and so I extend it to him. I don't think he quites gets it yet, but I figure it sure doesn't hurt to start talking about it!
I just told Michael today that one thing I hated about potty training was that if he gets it, then I'm praised and if he doesn't get it then I am the one that looks like a failure-like I can't teach my child to use the restroom. It is such a humbling experience.
You are so blessed to have so many friends that are going through the same thing that you are and that you can lean on when you are hurting! We all love you and understand what you are going through!
btw...did you get my e-mail? I hope you did so you didn't think I was blowing off your message from the other night. :) Let me know if you didn't get it.
Hugs!
I echo all the above comments. It good and refreshing to read a post like your's. Makes one feel actually more normal. Sometimes I view those I know to have it all. They seem so perfect and like things are always in order. We all have been there--you are not alone. Potty training is one small step forward in the many you will make as a parent. May we pray that we can embrace each one with grace, mercy, forgiveness, love, patience...let's see...the list could go on and on. :) Blessings to you as you raise your little ones up to know the LORD.
Oh Jessica-
I have been praying for you today. I hope you are having a great day. The potty training will come, boys are hard and James was not reayd until he was 3. Thanks for being real, that is such life, not perfect. In time you will look back and laugh. Hang in there. Love ya
OH but I wanted to say that your bags are out of this world. You are talented girl. Oh I have an idea for you that I need to call you about, I want you to make me something. Much love
Jess, we will be praying for you, we all have frustrations and it is good to be able to let them out. One thing, kids tend to physically have accidents when they are going through growth spurts, so maybe in a couple of days he will be back to going on the potty.
Oh Jess...I feel for you! I hope today was better!
~Alissa
I am not a regular reader here, so I am not sure how old your little one is, but my little guy is nearly 4, and seriously the potty thing? Enough to kill me. Man they make it hard. I try to be all zen about it and act like it doesnt matter (when of course it does) because I dont want a power struggle, but you have my heartfelt sympathy on that matter.
I just happened upon your blog but had to comment on your potty training frustration. I have four kids ages 9-19 (all potty trained :)) It was by far the worst part of parenting. It doesn't last long, relatively speaking, but it can test your motherly patience to no end. Boys are typically a little harder, but he will get it. Just know that, yes there will be accidents, it doesn't mean you are not doing a good job. Don't beat yourself up, which I also did as a mom when my kids were young. Now, when I ask them if they remember me "losing it" when they were potty training they have no memory of it. Basically the love you give him is what will be remembered, not your frustration with him or your impatience. Give him an M&M every time he does it right and just remember that it may take him awhile but it will happen.
I know it sounds trite but this too shall pass, we used to joke about our youngest that we would be sending him to school with a diaper in his lunch box.;-( He loved them and loved the advertisements on TV, he was three when he was trained. I had changed diaper brands, he didn't like them, I told him he was too big of a boy for diapers anymore and he finally worked at it and got it ;-) Don't waste time beating yourself up, take the forgiveness our heavenly father gives and go forward, wiser and better... God Bless
I'm so sorry you're in this boat, but so glad to know I'm not floating around by myself. I think God sends our children along to remind us of our need for him.
Big Hugs!
I can soooooooooooo relate. The phone went into the potty. The oakley's we have lost three pair and I wish oh wish London would use the potty for pottying! lol. Your work is beautiful. Hang in there and have a blessed week!
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